Whoa! Brace yourself for a bloodbath of epic ancient battles splattering the screen and turning the beautiful blue Aegean red with the blood of these legendary Battles of Artemisium and Salamis.
Plutarch and Herodotus would be pleased with this bloodthirsty but beautiful retelling of Ancient Greek history.
Artemisia was brilliantly badass and I could even forgive Themistocles’ Aussie accent after a while, so commanding was his presence, though that sex scene between them was the most bizarre thing I’ve ever seen!
Visually the film is stylised so divinely that death and deceit, war and battle, lust and pride are decadently dressed in leather fringed, off the shoulder gowns spiked with studs warriors bulge out of leather jockettes and blue capes and kings are encased in gilded chains.
Cinematography is brilliantly dreamlike, particularly the underwater scenes of war dances that leave you longing for a watery grave.
You’ll gasp and groan, thrill and delight, chant the battle cry AH HOO AH HOO AHOO , palpitate with pride and wish you loved something so achingly much with all of your being that you would gladly fight and die for it.